So what happened?

We talked and I asked him how we should move forward - I wanted to hear what he really wants and I want to feel if being with me is what his heart dictates. I have to admit that I missed talking to him, the way he listens and makes me feel mature and the way he makes sense of my ramblings. Seeing him after 3 days of letting things cool down made me realize that I love him still. The question is, does he feel the same way too?

Seeing him also reminded me of the pain - it was like cold water was running down my back. It wasn't easy. He couldn't look me in the eye at first, he didn't make a move to hold me, he just stared at me then smiled, I smiled back and then I realized that he was really sorry. No matter what happened, no matter what mistake he made, no matter what he did and what he didn't do before what matters is right now. I understood that he was lost, he felt lost. I know it does not justify anything he did, it doesn't make what happened right but what felt right was fixing what was broken.

I told him that this was not gonna be an easy road. I want him to make an effort to earn back the trust that was lost. I could go into details but it would take a day to write what was talked about.

We agreed to start over and no I haven't forgotten what happened, but yes I forgive him. We decided to not see each other 'til Saturday. Just to give time for both of us to see more clearly. I want both of us to be sure that this is the path we want and that we both see each other in our future.

I saw the heart of the man who did not intend to hurt. I pray that we can get over this. Is the relationship worth saving? -- yes. 

I pray to God that what I saw in Chicco is real. I pray that he can live up to his word. I pray.. I pray..