Inspiring

Chin up

I know I need to support Miguel whatever his plans are.. but it's less than two months before he leaves. I know it's not permanent, I know he loves me and I know he'd go back for me but I am scared. I know he makes an effort to spend as much time as possible with me -- I appreciate that. Bakit ako nasa-sad? I know it's just for a year pero bakit ako nasa-sad tlaga? He's gonna miss my birthday, our first anniversary and other milestones.. pero sabi nya nga when he gets back we have a lifetime to share together.

Pero on the lighter side, we have a year apart. We have time to improve ourselves, to be better people for each other. Sana lng wag sya masanay masyado na wala ako. I trust him - I do. Of all my relationships, si Miguel is the first one to make me feel secure. Kaya namin 'to :) di ba? Aja!

Random post. sorry :D

Christmas 2011

In a week, it would be Christmas. I realized this fact while Sarah and I were casuallyt alking about Christmas Parties and changing our regular worn-out bills to crisp and fragrant ones which would be given to inaanaks - most of which I only get to see once a year and of course they chose Christmas day to visit Ninang Alecs :)

I remember when I was younger Christmas is a big deal for me. Aside from my birthday, it's one of the holidays where I receive gifts. I like receiving gifts that went through a thinking process or have meanings. When I was 9 years old my Tita Liza gave me a watch because she saw how on time I was and how fidgety I get when I am late.There was also a time wasy back in highschool when mommy gave me a bag -- a huge one, just because she knows that I tend to put tons of things in my bag and because she knows I like oversized bags. Miguel gave me books that I was looking for a long long time because he knows I like to read. See? Gifts with significance makes ordinary days extra special. I am not saying that I don't appreciate other gifts - the mere fact that I am on somebody's gift list is enough to make my heart go pitter-patter. I just feel extra special when someone takes time to get to know what I really want :)

This Christmas is the first one that we get to spend with Cholo - our little angel, the blessing that made our family closer than ever. This is also the first Christmas(in 5 years) where Denise is no longer with Erick, I know my sister is sad right now so we need to make her feel loved more than ever. This is the first Christmas when I am worried to bits because my mom would be undergoing an operation after the holidays. This is my first Christmas with Miguel, after years of having ordinary holidays I know this one would be... LEGEN ..wait for it.. DARY!(Barney Stinson voice. lol). 

What I want for Christmas is for everyone I love to be safe and happy and at peace. I wish Mom's operation would go well and I wish that Dad would take care of himself more, I wish that Denise would be enlightened and would be able to make the decision to move forward or to fully let go of Erick, I wish that Miguel would pass his embassy interview. I wish Cholo would grow up to be a good boy. I know wished do come true, it's part of the Christmas magic :)

2012 aint the end of the world

It kinda bothers me that Miguel is always sick nowadays. I really can't put a finger to it, but I know there's something wrong with him. He works too hard and pushes himself too much with everything that he's doing. I wish he would slow down - contrary to the movie, 2012 is not the end of the world yet. So I hope he stops doing things like there's no tomorrow.

I hope he gets well real soon. I really do.

Oh well, on a lighter note - since 2012 is definitely not the end of the world, I really have to watch my finances, my family is growing and expenses are piling up, I am losing more than what I am getting monthly. It's stressful. I know things will be lighter come February because of the Bank Loan for the house but still it worries me that Andi and Gio would be enrolling on June. 

I am thinking of moving on to greener pastures but I can't leave the comfortable schedule that I have and the people that I am working with, plus the work I do is not as stressful as before. I am on a crossroad and I dunno which path to take. I am confused as hell. 

Well, I know things will fall into place real soon. I trust that Papa Jesus has plans for me. I should just let Him lead me to where I should be. 

I pray each night to keep all my loved ones safe, I pray that I could provide a better life for my siblings, I pray that Mom and Dad gets better and that they stay with us for a loooong time, I pray that Miguel will be my forever and that he will get to know the value of health, I pray that I things will fall into place real soon. Thank you Papa Jesus!

Mi-Lessa

Remember KimErald? KathNiel? JaMich? MelAson? Love-teams, yeah. Being the jologs that I am, I kinda played with my name and Miguel's. I got MigueLessa, Mi-Lecs, Sa-Mig,  Gue-ssa(witty, noh?lol) until finally I came up with Mi-Lessa. Yeah, I invested time trying to think of the perfect name for our loveteam, I am weird like that. haha 

Now I am thinking of opening a facebook fan page! kidding :) This goes to show that I have nothing useful to do. My mind is wandering. :D

Just so you know, I am laughing all throughout writing this blog. :p